"Are You Open To Love?" I ask. You say "Of course! What kind of question is that?, who isn't?". Isn't it amazing that we think that and yet, there are millions of people who say they want love yet when it comes to the crunch they are not really open to it?
Imagine you want to buy something. You go to the shop. You see the items you want in the shop. But then you pick the item and just before you are about to pay for it, your mind tells you..."no I don't want this" and you go put it back on the shelf. How many times have you done that? Is it because you didn't like the item? Is it because you want the item but not yet open to having it? Food for thought!
Imagine an owner of a shop who just started in business. What if the shop had all the amazing products in the world inside and never opened for business? They could have the most unbelievable quality products with features loved by many customers but the shop never opened for business? How could a potential customer get to see the products inside? How could a customer relationship be established if the customer never got to see the products inside the shop?
We could each have amazing qualities inside us. We all have beautiful qualities this world needs. It might be our ability to sincerely show our compassion. It might be our ability to make another person feel like a million bucks, or our ability to cook like the world's best chef, or our ability to just hold another human being in such a way that they feel wanted, or our ability to light up the other person's heart with our smile. It varies and the list is endless. How can another human being see our inner qualities and get to enjoy our abilities if we are closed for love?
What do I mean by that? Well, everyone needs love. We all feel lonely now and then. So we think we need love and go around our daily chores thinking we will bump into the person we want to spend the rest of our lives with. Occasionally we meet people we think we like and get along. We think, "wow! He or she seems to be exactly the one I am looking for" etc.
Time goes by and we get to know that person who seem to fit our bill of qualities we want in a lover / mate. We get to a point where we need to make conclusive decisions regarding the relationship. We need to decide whether to get more closer to this person and get him or her committed to you either as an exclusive boyfriend or girlfriend or move in or get engaged etc.
The moment arrives when you are put on the spot to make a decision to get committed to the decision to move forward to the next step. You panic. You come up with all kinds of excuses not go to the next step. You wonder why you can't seem to make the decision to go forward. You can't seem to put the finger on why this is the case. On a deeper level, we are sometimes confused about love. This can be due to several reasons. Some are as follows;
1) Painful Past Experiences 2) Loss of Independence 3) Lack Of Time 4) Fear Of Commitment 5) Busy Lifestyle 6) Financial Reasons 7) Our Need To Remain Who We Are 8) Fear Of Intimacy 9) Lack of Self Esteem 10) Perfectionist Mentality
The above reasons list can differ from one person to another as each one of us are from varying cultural, family, belief systems, value systems and other social conditioning. So the above can vary from one factor being applicable to you to more than one or even all of them being applicable to you. Only you can self explore which ones ring a bell when you look deeper inside yourself.
Let me explain each of the above in more detail so you can better understand what each of the above points mean and how it relates to you being open to love or not. To make this article more readable and friendly I have kept it to an acceptable length so I don't overload you with information today. This is a 10 part article series to explore this very important issue. In part 2 of this article I will go further into each one of the above 10 factors. Don't miss it!
Copyright 2006 Joshua Danicio |
